My Daddy Is A....
At Cherryvalley High, meanwhile, Miss Fotheringill is asking the good little
boys and girls of first year what their fathers do, so that the headmistress can
mark out the future prefects. 'My daddy is a judge, Miss Fotheringill, says little
Samantha, brushing back the royal blue bow which holds her mane of freshly-washed
'Very good, Samantha dear,' says Miss Fotheringill, placing a discreet tick beside
little Samantha's name in her big black book before moving on to the desk of little
'My daddy's a consultant surgeon, Miss Fotheringill,' says little Roland, his
big blue eyes filled with the innocence of freshly clipped church lawns.
'That's very nice, Roland dear,' says Miss Fotheringill, marking little Roland
down as a future head boy and moving on to the desk of little Jimmy, whose father
is a bookmaker. Miss Fotheringill does not know this, but the tattoo of a swallow
flitting across little Jimmy's neck has already drawn her to the conclusion that
little Jimmy is definitely not future officer material.
'My da's dead,' lies little Jimmy.
'Oh dear,' says Miss Fotheringill, overcome with remorse for her unkind thoughts
about the poor lad. 'And what did he do before he died, little James?'
'He grabbed his throat and went "Aaaarrrrggghhhh", Miss.'